Many locals and visitors will be indulging in that incomprehensible habit of lying semi-naked, exposed to a continuous nuclear explosion, albeit millions of miles away, (the sun). Anyway, with a bit of luck, common sense will return and people will start taking notice of how desert dwellers have always treated exposure to the sun. A recent report by pharmaceutical experts warned people that suntan lotions only have a life of twelve months after being opened - in other words, the bottle that you bought last year, isn't much cop.

Sporting a suntan has only been the fashion since just after the Second World War. Until then, if you had one, it was because you were forced to work under the sun, thanks to your lowly status. In the days of the British Raj, sun-tanned officers, for example, were those who had had to buy one of the less fashionable, 'cheap' commissions in the Imperial Indian Army.

By the late fifties, conversely, a suntan meant that you had enough money to holiday abroad. Nowadays, people who return from Spain or anywhere sunny without a suntan go back with a trembling lower lip, feeling in some way cheated. The Government, however, is taking the report made by the General Council of the Official College of Chemists very seriously and has decided that from next year on, a warning will be printed on all sun-protection products. It's also worth remembering that children have a risk factor that is three times higher than that of adults.

The minimum sun factor that a baby should use up to 18 months old is a photo-protection of 15, which will reduce the risk of skin cancer in later life by 75%. In those first 18 months of a child's life, he or she will receive between 50% and 80% of sun exposure during a whole lifetime. According to Ana Aliaga, who is the national spokeswoman for Dermofarmacia, children aged under three should not be exposed to the sun - not even under a parasol. She also points out that many parents do not use sun creams correctly because they do not apply them at least 30 minutes before exposure to the sun. The ideal would be two hours. Most people apply such creams once on the beach but for all the inconvenience, the correct place should be at home, before starting out. The reason being that your skin should be perfectly dry when you apply the sun barrier for maximum effect - on the beach, sweat and sand diminish its effectiveness.

Finally, there is no such thing, she says, as a 'healthy' suntan - they are all the result of exposing the skin to ultra violet rays... and that ain't nothin' healthy, folks!

The Town Council are getting really serious, at last, about rubbish collection. In fact, they have issued 337 fines in the last two months. If you live in town, they you cannot put your rubbish out before 20.00 and no later than 23.00. It has to be in plastic bags, which have to be in a dustbin. The dustbin, even if empty, is not allowed to remain in the street during the day. The councillor in charge of this department, the Councillor for the Environment said, "If we could spend less time imposing fines, then we could spend more time on improving the service." If you have any complaints about or suggestions on rubbish collection, then you can phone 958 838 600. Otherwise, give me a buzz on 958 881 750 and I will pass your message on. This is, of course, because you are unable to do it yourself for language reasons, and not because you're a lazy bastard... sort of thing.

The International Day of the Environment was observed in the town and to mark the occasion a group of school kids from Antigua Sexi Secondary School were taken up to the Peña Escrita Mountain Park for the day. There, they planted trees - each tree bearing the name of the pupil who planted it. By the way, I took the opportunity to pop up there myself around the middle of last month to see how the swimming pool repair work was coming on and to meet the new people who are running it. The road up to the park has been greatly improved. The stretch at the back of Torrecuevas is in the process of being widened and re-tarmacked. If you haven't been there then you really should take the time to visit it. It is quite a climb, mind but he view once you have arrived more than compensates for it. You don't need a 4x4 to get there, either. There's plenty of wildlife in the form of ostriches, mountain goats, deer and God knows what else. Whilst I was waiting for a spot of lunch at the bar restaurant, I got chatting with Eddie and Ursula who had braved the ascent. They like the place immensely. Eddie and Ursula had bought a flat in Taramay, where they will eventually retire to and where, hopefully, family and friends can visit them. I asked them how they had come to know about the mountain park and Eddie told me that he had come across in on Internet. It turned out that the web site that he was visited was www.almuñécar.com and had browsed the Gazette link. I took plenty of photos whilst I was up there and had a good chat with the people that run it, so I shall soon get round to doing an article on the park, if anybody is interested. If Eddie and Ursula are reading this on the net: greetings from Mary and me!

There was no doubt about it - San Juan was a lot quieter than on previous occasions. Up until about five years ago, it had always been a family event and although teenagers got together it was never rowdy. The tonic was to get round the campfire with a guitar, a good supply of alcohol and food and the girl/boy friend... or with somebody else's. Anybody who fell asleep before the rest, i.e., before sunrise, was thrown ceremoniously into the sea to brighten them up. Yet, for the last few years it has been getting out of hand. It was no longer 'a night' on the beach but more like a mammoth three to five day event. Impromptu bars and discotheques sprang up. It was more like a Mad Max encampment. Last year, the Town Council came down upon the revellers and re-established the law, so to speak. The night of the eve of San Juan would remain precisely that - a night, not two or three. Discos and bars were prohibited. This year - the second of the 'New Order' events were similarly subdued. However, despite the long faces, it didn't stop the campers leaving 20 tons of rubbish behind them. The spirit of San Juan on the beach has burnt low, but that is the fault of the revellers. No doubt, controls will ease off again and San Juan's will be as it always was - a place to take the guitar, a crate of beer and a packet of three, just in case.

Let me just say here that Juan Luis, the ex-mayor, as a person, is not a bad lad. But there it ends. Although the different parties throw mud at each other in the form of accusations of corruption etc, the truth is that in my personal opinion, they're all painted with the same brush. Big Bad Benny is a known factor and he makes no pretence about it. You vote for Benny and he will look after you - make sure that your family eats. His rule is nepotist but they all love him in the poorer quarters of town. The foreigners do as well - he's a kind of Jesús Gil & Gil. Juan Luis, on the other hand, is a lawyer by profession and he projects the image of a good businessman of honest standards, yet... The socialist, on the other hand, threw out the only decent politician they had amongst them, Antonio Rebollo - so enough said. So why this political break down? Simply, so that it should come as no surprise to learn that somebody other than Big Bad Benny is being investigated by the judiciary authorities. This time the trouble is the proposed four-star hotel in El Pozuelo, Taramay. 'The Judge sees Indications of Crime in the Paperwork for the Almuñecan hotel,' reads the headlines. It all started in December last year, when a group of neighbours filed a law suit against the proposed hotel owners, alleging urban irregularities and fraud, citing the ex-mayor (PP) Juan Luis González and the legal representative of the building company. The municipal surveyor in December 2002 handed over a negative finding for the siting of a hotel in the area, citing that the building quota for this zone has already been exhausted. Yet months later the Town Council, with 'a favourable report' approved the project, pending confirmation from the Junta de Andalucía (regional government). In February 2004 it was rejected by this body, citing that the chosen area was a private green belt area. This is what the judge has picked up on - it was approved by the municipal council even though the municipal surveyor gave a negative report. The Council had tried to modify the Town Planning Ordinance to accommodate the hotel. The ex-mayor has come out in defence of the councillors who tried to do this, stating that it had been done, 'in the interest of making Almuñécar a paragon of economic, commercial and tourist activity.' All told 20 modifications have been made to the PGOU (Town Planning Ordinance) to build various hotels in the township. He also says that the council meeting had approved unanimously the proposal (omitting to say that the opposition party hadn't bothered to turn up). Finally, he says that there had been no illegal action made because the modification had not come about.

If you can't be bothered to go all the way up to Granada and then join an endless queue to be able to visit the Alhambra Palace, then we might just have what you are looking for. I've checked out a web sight that lets you vew the Alhambra from several vantage points. From each point you can pan 360º. You can also zoom in and out on any particular point. The quality is not excellent but sometimes in life we have to give the Whinging Pom syndrome a rest, right? Besides the panning and zoom you can change the vertical/horizontal orientation as well. Give it a burn. Visit their website.

Another interesting feature that Ideal newspaper online offers is a photo & info section for virtually every village and town in Granada Province. The photo are aerial shots and the info covers everthing from history, local culinary recipes, map information to local customs. (Visit their website). Of course, the information isn't just for you Almuñécan lot, but we were short for space elsewhere - so spread the word.

José Montalvo, the man who provided our cartoons, tells me that the old Tesoro Escondido is now open again. The pub, in itself, is unique. It is, without doubt, the oldest pub in Almuñécar, although it has passed through many hands. Many, many years ago it started off life as a baker's and still retains the old oven. José, who speaks excellent English, is multi-talented. My friendship with him goes back twenty years, eighteen of which, we played in the same rock band together. He's a talented painter, musician, recording engineer and, of course, cartoonist. I don't know whether José will actually be behind the bar, but in any case, most nights he will be there, I imagine. The Tesoro Escondido (Hidden Treasure) is a little off the beaten track, as the name suggests, but it is, nevertheless, right in the centre of town. If you go through the arch next to the Oasis bar in the town hall square, you turn first right and first left - it's just a question of metres. It's well worth a visit because the pub is a labyrinth of rooms. Oh, the original well is preserved and viewable, with reinforced glass on top. Good music is assured, if José has anything to do with it and the setting, as I said, is unique. Go, visit & enjoy!

Here comes the golf course(s)! The Mayor has announced that there will be an 18-hole golf course laid next to Cotobro. Not only that, but there will also be 248 VPO flats (basically, council houses). Vergel Tropical will be the name of this urban huge expansion scheme. 534m euros will be spent on this golf course, which will share the 2,000,000 sqm plot with a hotel and both private and council housing. ¡Toma castaña! Who's behind it? Inves Asesoramiento Inmobiliario, Borrag Investitiions AG, Jesús Ruiz Peralta, Joaquín Cabreras Torrres and Mitawa AG, who between them account for 61% of the land. The plot is between La Herradura and Almuñécar (Los Corrales, the rubbish dump, Cotobro and nearby areas). The architect of the project, Guillermo Santacruz Sánchez de Rojas, said that the original idea only counted on 200,000sqms, belonging to Inves Asesoramiento Inmobilario SL in Cotobro, but a further 800,000sqms were later added. "The terrain is of the most difficult for a golf course. So much so that ist design always had to be conditioned to the housing. This is not a charity, but a business set up by investors and, of course, they want to see the venture make profit and to generate wealth for Almuñécar," said Sr. Santacruz. . The complex will have three access points. One of which will run under the main road Cotobro bridge, (goodbye to one of Spain's oldest existing Roman bridges). Another will lead off the N-340 at an undetermined point and the last hasn't been decided yet. As for the actual golf course, it will be of the 'bravíos' kind - in other words, you'll need ropes and tackle. A golfer's accuracy, the spokesman admits, will have to be excellent. The average par will be 60 strokes because the stretch needed to bring it up to 72 is 'not practical'. More info.

The Mayor of Jete - the first village going up Rio Verde Valley - is asking for access to the motorway. As things stand, anybody from Otívar, Lentegí or Jete would have to come all the way down to Almuñécar to be able to gain access to the said motorway. He pointed out that Rio Verde Valley is Spain's - indeed Europe's - prime chirimoya and níspola producing area. Sound reasoning. He said that from the very beginning, they have been asking for such an access to the new road but that the valley (predominantly socialist) had always been ignored by the previous conservative government. "The reasons given by the previous government," says Jete's mayor, "are ludicrous: it would mean too much earth moving." He argues that Almuñécar's connection required vast amounts of earth movement, involving towering embankments. Yet the proposal set forward by Jete's village council only calls for one kilometre of access road and no major earth movement works, he says.

It has now been announced that the project Palace of Justice, or in other words, the new law courts, will be going up behind Las Gondolas, which on the way to Velilla. The plot, which has been used up till now as a car park, measures some 3,884sqm. That, Ladies & Gentlemen, means goodbye to yet another emergency car park in town. The plot was originally reserved for either a hotel, council houses or the Palacio de Justicia plus council houses. That land actually belonged to the regional authorities under the public land company, EPSA. The deal is that EPSA cedes this 3,884sqm plot to Almuñécar, in exchange that within four years the Town Council cedes a plot of 7,668sqm EPSA. Failing this, the Town Council will have to pay them 838,760 euros, which is what the land is worth as council house building land. This plot behind Las Gondolas was originally handed over to the town for council houses in 1995, but the sneaky Town Council, re-categorised the land as 'hotel plot,' which is their favourite party trick. The regional authorities immediately took the town to the tribunals and there it remained, until this above deal was struck.

The Saturday Flea Market will not take place in August, mainly because the market ground will be used as much needed parking space during this peak season. The organisation has changed as well. From now on anybody who wants to sell at the Saturday market, which is always held on the first Saturday of each month, will have to pay three months up front. You will then be awarded your plot number. No overnight parking will be permitted and traders will not be able to begin setting up their stalls before 07.00. Stalls must be taken down by 15.00. These new measures have been forced on the organisers because of some traders have been abusing the situation. Special one-off bookings will be considered - contact Netty. Now, with a plot booked three months up front, there should be no squabbling over plots. Some traders appear to have forgotten that the whole thing was set up as a charity event to collect funds for the Cancer Association - and not for them to move in and attempt to monopolise the event or intimidate others. ¡Eres una maquina, Netty!

The IV Clubs Fair was held in the Majuelo Botanical Gardens this year on the 12th of June - last year it was held in the Town Hall Square. The idea is for the people of Almuñécar - home grown and imported - to have the chance to see what the local clubs and associations are up to. There were clubs of all kinds: environmental, cultural and sports. During the morning there were kendo, karate, aerobic and even table-tennis displays. Of course, our Pepe the Postman was there with his aero-modelling stand, showing off impressive model airplanes. In the afternoon the town brass band had a burst, as did the La Herradura Chorus. Are there any radio hams out there (INT QSA INT QRK K)? Well, we have our very own club, as well. I could mention all the clubs present but it wouldn't make interesting reading - although it would fill this page for me!

At last the village will have a children's doctor. However, the victory is incomplete, as coverage will only be limited. "The surgery for the paediatrician will be available three days a week, one of which will be full-day attendance and the other two only half days. To begin with, as we have little space in the doctor's surgery, this new service has had to fit in with the GP," says María Victotria Ruiz, the Vice-Mayoress and Delegate for La Herradura. The surgery times for the child doctor will be from 12.00 to 15.00 on Monday and Wednesday and all morning on Fridays... when most La Herradureñas mothers are shopping at the weekly market in Almuñécar. Sra. Ruiz also made a point of the fact that the town hall had already offered to the Servicio Andaluz de Salud a 160sqm premises to house all the different health functions that La Herradura might need - including a paediatric surgery and for a médico de desplazados (a doctor who attends non residents). But this is not the only demand made by the villagers - they want more staff in the medical centre in general. For example, the centre needs an administrator-cum-attendance clerk. "Now that the town hall has given ample premises to the the SAS, they should meet our demands," says one villager, "because the two doctors and the nurse don't have an administrator or janitor." For the last twenty years the system has been for an employee from the town hall to open up the office and issue appointment numbers from 08.00 to 10.00. At the moment, it is a bricklayer who does this. The nurse also helps out, which means that there is less time for that person to carry out house calls, etc.

Work has been carried out by Tragsa, which is a company that works for the Ministry of Environment, on the access to the La Herradura beach. This is part of a general improvement to Almuñécar and La Herradura beaches. 470,000 euros later, you probably won't notice the difference, but never mind. Council workmen are like porn stars - they must not only work, but that they must be seen to be working!

The following item of news happened on the 28th May, which, as you can imagine, happened too late in the month to be included in the June issue. The Junta de Andalucía has urged the town hall to halt the building of a six-storey construction in Carmenes del Mar, Cerro Gordo. Not only that but the Department of Public Works has also pressed them to revise the building permission given to the construction company, Comarex to build this monstrosity. Comarex are also the company that built the Sol Melía Hotel on San Cristóbal beach in Almuñécar. The six-storey building on Cerro Gordo is part of the V Phase of the Carmenes del Mar residential estate. The building clearly exceeds the size limitations stipulated in the municipal building regulations, both in height and volume. It is a total barbarity that this area of natural beauty has been destroyed by Carmenes del Mar and a veritable crime that a six-storey building plus a tower has been allowed to get this far! This is what Shakespeare, Chaucer and the Venerable Bede would have qualified as, taking the piss.' Comarex also just managed to slip in a further 81sqm of bricks and concrete beyond the 1,089.45 permitted. That is equivalent to a small flat, for the love of God, so it's not exactly a case of 'oops! Sorry, my hand slipped with the cement trowel,' or whatever it is called, is it? The Department of Public Works goes on to say that a three-metre minimum separation that must be left between and public right of way or other buildings has not been respected, either. They've even swallowed up a piece of public right of way. Building work had already been stopped once by the town hall because of certain building irregularities, but according to the Mayor, the company had rectified the situation and had been allowed to continue construction work in January. It was the neighbourhood association, 'Pueblo' who reported the company to the town hall and who wisely also reported it at the same time to the regional authorities. So even though that the Town Council considers that everything is hunky-dory, The voice from above does not... so there! "The construction eliminates the view of an elevated number of houses," says the spokesman for the neighbourhood association, José García, adding, "they haven't even left a margin between the natural park and the buildings." It is calculated that the said building negatively effects directly 60 other dwellings. The snag is that the Junta de Andalucía, to date, can only urge and not 'order' the Town Council to stop the work. It should come as no surprise, therefore, that they will be dragging their heels under the pretext of necessary reports and paperwork. In the meantime, as the building only needs a few finishing touches inside, the dirty deed will be completed.

The opposition members of the Town Council have complained about the Councillor for Citizen Safety and Traffic, Daniel Barbero. One of their complaints is that if you do something wrong in La Herradura, you get a warning, whereas if you do the same thing in Almuñécar, you get fined directly. This is an alusion towards Daniel Barbero's leniency towards the Herradureños, which is where he comes from. A touch of nepotism is implied. It goes without saying that he has drawn a load of flak over the Paseo parking work - the very slow progress being made. The opposition said that it would also be nice if he were to pass a few days in the Almuñécar office, and not only in his La Herradura one. Daniel Barbero rejects these multiple criticism and responds, "What was good, remains good and what was bad, has been improved." Óle! He also emphasised that the towns' beaches will have special vigilance from the 1st July to the 30th September.

There was a bit of a hullabaloo at the beginning of last month, which started in Maro and ended in La Herradura, where a stolen lorry smashed into various other vehicles. According to a statement made by the councillor, Daniel Barbero, local police were alerted by telephone calls from residents in the Rambla del Espinar, who were complaining about the damage caused to several cars by a lorry with the registration MA 5778 BF. The vehicle has been stolen in Maro by a man of North African origin. "At the moment of the theft, the man tried to run over one of the owners of the lorry, because he tried to stop him," stated Sr. Barbero. The thief crashed into several other vehicles before he could reach the main road. On reaching La Herradura he rammed into about a dozen parked cars in the Rambla del Espinar. There, he decided to ditch the stolen lorry and run off. To date, he still hasn't be caught, nor is he liable to be. The councillor considers that the man must have been an illegal immigrant on his way to Almería and that he had entered La Herradura, fearing being chased on the main road.

The first summer fire behind the village was extinguished with alacrity and professionalism. The helicopter entertained beach watchers as it swooped down to such up water on repeated and rapid occasions. However, it was also over in moments. The fire started in the Barranco de Las Tejas behind hostal Los Verdiales. In the one short hour of its bothersome life it managed to burn almost a hectare of subtropical fruit trees and mountain shrub. By the time that we got our act together, after being, alerted by a phone call, the firemen were standing around looking bored and fingering cigarette lighters longingly. Never mind - the summer is long and the pyromaniacs many!

Talking of pyromaniacs, they arrested two Germans suspected of burning down the pier house. It only took the local police 24 hours to lay hands on the alleged culprits. The suspects are W.C.A., who has just turned 19 and 18-year-old R.C. Allegedly, with the aid of petrol and paper, they set light to the pier house at 04.00 on morning at the beginning of June. Despite the wood being specially treated and being of the kind little disposed to spontaneous combustion, anyway, the whole thing went up in spectacular flames. The firemen had put it out not long after it started but at around 10.00 the same morning the wind brought it back to life. Rebuilding the burnt pier house is the responsibility of the coastal authorities and not of the municipal ones - so it will probably stay like that for quite some time. The damage was valued at 12,000 euros. But above all, it had to be foreigners, didn't it? The village, like Almuñécar, is becoming more and more foreign dominated, especially by the Brits. Although on this occasion the hooligans were German, it's the sort of thing that you expect but don't miss about UK living.

This year's San Juan festivities in La Herradura were a peaceful low key affair. Twenty odd groups camped on the beach, ranging from sophisticated family encampments complete with TV, halogen lamps and huge barbecues sizzling- to the more intimate set up of a tent and bottle of cava under the stars… The annual ablutions were tentative, due to the chilly sea temperatures but one could still spot the older Herradurian folk dutifully carrying out the annual ablutions in the hope of obtaining 'eternal beauty'! The kid's play area just (just next to The Hideaway) was host to some of the evening's musical entertainment. The musical duo played traditional Spanish music to a medley of generations that danced the night away amongst the swings and slides. Apparently, there was also good action at the Nuevo Camping end of the beach with live music and a young, lively crowd.

The Ed. and the Pub. popped in to see Rudi & Maggie at the El Gallinero Restaurant, which is on the N-340 main road just above the village. Sharing a few wines in this excellent ambience, the Ed. spotted their collection of cartoons. One of them is the one they we have printed above... brilliant! In fact, the whole restaurant is impregnated with humour: a cockrel crows everytime that somebody walks in through the door. The men's toilet is a master piece! The urinal is a real television set behind a large sheet of glass. So, you can express your opinion on what is on the TV in the most original and satisfying manner! Rudi & Maggie prepare and present chicken in every imaginable way. But it's not only chicken because they also do - with sufficient notice - authentic Swiss cheese fondues, as well as buffet-style meat fondues.

Brothers, Ángel and Antonio at the Chambao de Vicente, which is at the west end of the bay, have re-opened the roof terrace for the summer evenings. This is probably the best spot to watch the day ebb from the sky, enjoying a nice, long, cool drink on this spendid terrace overlooking the beach. The terrace has its own bar where only drinks are served - this is somewhere that you might go to treat yourself and company to an after-dinner sup.